Nothing is as 'sucky' as uncertainty.
Especially in a relationship. If I could control how i think i would. To this person i hurt in the process, was the equivalent of cutting off my own leg. Something for sure that i will regret later. That is not to say that i am over it. It's still hurting in the back of my head.
Regret that i could not take back.
My life in general is a wreck...to bring a significant other into something like that was not something that i was not able to do nor was i ready... so i did the only thing i could do ...(i.e cut off the leg) Things that were beyond my reach... I just want to be sure of things. life moves on and we are still friends like we were before. To have some time to think and get my act and things together so that i could be much more focused and helpful to the person that needs me the most. I want to be better. I am not asking you to hold your breath, i am using this time wisely to think about things. I needed soul searching and some answers for my self. I am saying however im sorry.
It is nothing that i have planned, and that the only thing that i can and will do for is be support if you want it from me. I am hopefully thinking that it should not be long. and that if we were ment to be ...you'll be the first to know with know hesitation. I have always been honest with you about how i feel so you know that i am telling the truth.